Greetings:
Father’s Day is June 20, and as I look forward to that day, it allows me to reflect on the role of father and parent.  I remember when my son Karl was sixteen.  He wanted to go to a friend’s house one night to a party.  He asked if he could borrow my car because he was experiencing mechanical problems with his.  I told him to go ahead, but to be careful.
Shortly after 10:00 p.m. I heard him drive into the garage.  When he came into the house I heard those words that a father never wants to hear from his teenage children, “Dad, I had a little accident.”
“Did you get hurt?” I asked.
“No,” my son replied.  “But the car has a little scratch on it.” 
I went with him to examine the “little” scratch that started from the front of the right rear fender and proceeded to go all the way to the back of it.  This was the first scratch put on my car, and because it happened while in the hands of my offspring I was extremely upset!  I ranted and railed and sent my son to his room and told him not to come out for the rest of the night.  He apologized, but I was so mad I didn’t hear it.  I stewed about the matter all that night and on into the next day.
That next day, my wife Teresa asked me how long I was going to continue ranting and raving.  The scratch could easily be fixed, so now it was time to fix the relationship between Karl and me.
The purpose of fatherly or parental discipline is to help children grow, not to exasperate and provoke them to anger or discouragement.   My discipline was carried out in frustration and anger.  He was sorry and repentant about the accident, but I failed to listen to him and failed to forgive him.    
In chapter 5:1 of Ephesians we read, “Be imitators of God, therefore, as dearly loved children and live a life of love, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God.”   As a parent I should have treated my son as Jesus treated those whom he loved.  This is crucial to a child’s development and to their understanding of what Christ is like.
Twelve years have now passed since the “scratch” accident and I’m still learning to be a father and also a grandfather.   At times it’s not easy, but I’m learning not to sweat the small stuff.  In fact, last fall my grandson Ryan spilled grape juice on our carpet.  As soon as the purple liquid hit the beige carpet he immediately looked at me and said, “Oh oh, I’m sorry.”
I looked at the puddle of grape juice and then back to Ryan and said, “That’s okay, accidents happen.  I’ll clean it up.”
Some people may say, you’re getting old and mellowing out, but I don’t think that’s the case.  I believe that at the age of 53 I’m finally figuring out what parenting is all about.  It’s showing what Christ is like through caring, loving, and forgiving.

In Christ’s Love,
Lyle